IAT-based Coaching

What is Integrated Attachment Theory?

Developed by Thais Gibson, Integrated Attachment Theory coaching has a few key points:

  • It is based on John Bowlby’s mid-century work on attachment theory.
  • It incorporates cognitive behavioral techniques to modify thought patterns, emotions and behaviors in the context of attachment dynamics.
  • Its emphasis is on self-healing, and how healing of relationships and external world dynamics stems from that. However, it is heavy in developing empathy and communication skills. As it is as heavily centered around the dynamics we have with others as much as with our own self, it is a unique blended approach that doesn’t alienate either side of the equation.
  • It is a practical, systemic and holistic approach to improving relationship and personal well-being.

Relationships are EVERYWHERE!

They’re our romantic partnerships and dating, friendships, family and even our co-workers, our boss and our employees at work. My approach is based on IAT coaching mentioned above to tackle disconnection in interpersonal relationship that can keep us stuck in unhappy patterns with our partners, family, friends, careers and ourselves.

Through my IAT-inspired coaching along with newly incorporated Meisner-inspired tools, I help you gain the tools and insight to break through vicious cycles, frustration and disconnection by reconnecting with yourself in order to connect with others from your most authentic center to increase the health of your relationships. We’ll discover your inner operating system (OS) through which you see the world, learn how others see the world due to their own OS, and learn healthy boundaries, needs meeting and communication for the health of your relationship with yourself and others.

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How does
Meisner fit?

Sanford Meisner created an acting technique based on repetition in order to eliminate actors being in their heads while on stage. In his book, he stated, “I wanted to eliminate all that head work, to take away all the mental manipulation and get to where the impulses come from.”

The inspiration for adding this component to my relational coaching came from the effect and transformation it had on my own personal development journey, unexpectedly. As soon as the first day of class, I realized the power it had to help me express my emotions. At that time, I didn’t know an ounce about attachment styles and how what I was experiencing prior was an avoidant tendency of “poker face” with my vulnerabilities. In developing my coaching program, I followed my sudden inclination to look into this acting technique and how it can benefit the goals of my clients.

This Backstage article writes,  “Humans long to be heard and understood. The repetition exercise allows people not only to be heard and taken seriously, but also to become expert listeners and steadfast focusers. Because of this, repetition isn’t only useful in the acting world, it’s also a scientifically proven tool to show understanding and cultivate trust, called ‘mirroring’ in psychotherapy. Mirroring is used to show empathy and foster safety.”

And this just scrathes the surface of the benefits of incorporating Meisner into coaching, adding benefits to reconnecting to our inner self, our emotions, our point of view we often are unclear of or adapt to our peers’, among many others. 

+ Speciality

  • Relationships with intercultural aspects
  • Relational patterns and vicious cycles
  • Having had thoughts such as:
    • “I keep attracting clingy partners”
      “I keep attracting emotionally unavailable partners”
      “My partners keep triggering me”
      “I’d rather be alone.” or “I’m not made for relationships.”
      “I can’t seem to find partners good enough for me / there’s no one out there.”
      “I think my relationship might be unhealthy/toxic.”

*As a reminder, coaching is not therapy. Coaching does not replace therapeutic services only offered by a licensed mental health professional. Therefore it does not diagnose or treat mental and emotional health conditions such as depression, anxiety and PTSD among many others.

Your Coach

Hi! I’m Arina. I never thought the title “coach” would ever be linked to my name. Just under a decade ago, I thought the idea of life coaching was either for the very wealthy, or (thanks to my practical upbringing) a scam. 2020, like for most of us, changed my entire world when I came across Thais Gibson’s Personal Development School on YouTube. I had previously heard about attachment styles, but never with such compassion, removal of pathology-like ideas, and infused with tangible action steps to be taken. If you’re like me, something like that is a great find, but also overwhelming to do on your own. And that is where people like me come in!

I’m a healing Fearful Avoidant who has truly been on both sides of this interesting spectrum. Attachment Style theory has described this as a person’s language, point of view of the world – and I describe it as one’s operating system (OS). Just like your phone or computer’s OS, our OS can also be upgraded, it needs maintenance and can have viruses and bugs infiltrating it. And just like any OS, malware can go undetected and making the holder of the OS presumed faulty.

I’m excited to debut the incorporation of Meisner acting technique into my coaching. I’m currently working on my MS in Marriage and Family Therapy. Though at this time I am not able to offer any type of therapeutic services, I look forward upon graduation and licensure, incorporating all I will learn into my future coaching practice. In the meantime, I am excited to offer the many tools I have already to help you beat the frustrating walls you keep running into in your relationship to yourself and others.

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